Anger

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Anger

Hell, wrote Jean-Paul Sartre, is other people. And he didn’t even know your boss, your in-laws or that infuriating talk show host with the wrong opinion on everything.

Then there are your teenage son’s new earring and the neighbor who lets her poodle yap all night. Be aware, though, that the longer the list of things that drive you up a wall, the more likely it is that you’ll suffer health consequences.

Research shows that carrying around a load of anger can hurt. One study of couples with high blood pressure found that a heated ten-minute argument caused a jump in pressure for both partners. And for those who are susceptible, anger can also bring on asthma symptoms and angina attacks. The remedies in this chapter—used with your doctor’s approval—may help reduce everyday anger, according to some health professionals.

See Your Medical Doctor When... You experience difficulty breathing or sudden breathlessness while angry. You have chest pain or painful breathing. You hurt yourself or another person. Your angry behavior persists for long periods or interrupts family life. You get into frequent fights.

Aromatherapy

“Rose is a classic remedy for anger,” says Los Angeles aromatic consultant John Steele. “We associate it so strongly with beauty and love that it’s almost impossible to stay angry once we catch a whiff of the fragrance.” It can be inhaled directly from the bottle or dabbed on the pulse points of the wrist, says Steele. If you’re in a pinch, he recommends putting a couple of drops of the essential oil on a handkerchief and inhaling. But a more economical way to use this expensive oil is in a candle diffuser. “Without a doubt, the oil goes further in a diffuser, and you can share it with whomever happens to be in the room,” says Steele.

For information on preparing and administering essential oils, including cautions about their use, see page 19. For information on purchasing essential oils, refer to the resource list on page 633.

Ayurveda

“Anger is a psychological reaction to excess pitta dosha,” says Vasant Lad, B.A.M.S., M.A.Sc., director of the Ayurvedic Institute in Albuquerque, New Mexico. (For more information about the Ayurvedic doshas, see “All about Vata, Pitta and Kapha” on page 28.) The first step toward controlling anger, he says, is to follow a diet that emphasizes simple, bland foods and eliminates hot, spicy dishes.

If chronic anger persists, Dr. Lad suggests using cooling oils to calm your emotions. Every morning, apply a drop of sandalwood essential oil to the area in the middle of your forehead, to the throat, to the breastbone, to the navel, to the temples and to the wrists. Before going to bed, rub one teaspoon of coconut oil on your scalp and on the soles of your feet, then take a warm shower before retiring. Sandalwood essential oil and coconut oil are available in most health food stores.

When you’re in the grip of sudden anger, Dr. Lad recommends steeping 1¼2 teaspoon of chamomile (available in most health food stores) and one tablespoon of finely chopped cilantro leaves in hot water for ten minutes. Allow the tea to cool, strain and sip it slowly.

Certain forms of pranayama, a yogic breathing exercise, can dissipate anger, says Dr. Lad. “Whenever you’re angry, make a tube of your tongue and breathe deeply through the tongue opening down into the belly,” says Dr. Lad. “Hold the breath in your lower belly for up to a half-minute and then exhale through the nose.” He recommends repeating this breathing pattern for a total of 12 to 24 breaths, twice daily.

Dr. Lad also suggests putting a cotton ball in the right nostril and breathing only through the left nostril for about 1 hour. Or he says to try plugging your right ear with cotton and hearing only through the left ear for between 6 and 12 hours. According to Dr. Lad, these techniques will help open up channels to the right brain and cool down anger.

Flower Remedy/Essence Therapy

“Children who have temper tantrums can really benefit from a blend of Impatiens and Crab Apple,” says Eve Campanelli, Ph.D., a holistic family practitioner in Beverly Hills, California. “Adults who experience dark, brooding, cynical anger are usually reacting to hopelessness and frustration, so I give them Gentian.”

Flower remedies are available in some health food stores and through mail order (refer to the resource list on page 635). For information on preparing and administering flower remedies, see page 37.

Food Therapy

Try not to overeat, and especially don’t overdo it on sugar, says Elson Haas, M.D., director of the Preventive Medical Center of Marin in San Rafael, California and author of Staying Healthy with Nutrition. “Any sugar overload can lead to anger, because as your blood sugar shifts, you go from being up and happy to down and irritable. The key is to reduce the sugar in your diet.” But reducing everything in your diet can also minimize food-related anger bursts. When you overeat, he says, you become bloated and full of gas. “That causes some people to feel agitated, frustrated and angry. Smaller meals can solve that. Also, avoid mixing too many foods per meal, which may not digest well and may cause gas.”

Homeopathy

“If you feel more irritable than normal, one remedy you can try is Nux Vomica,” says Stephen Messer, N.D., dean of the National Center for Homeopathy’s summer school and a naturopathic physician in Eugene, Oregon. He suggests taking Nux Vomica 6C every four hours until you begin feeling less hostile.

Nux Vomica is available in many health food stores. To purchase homeopathic remedies by mail, refer to the resource list on page 637.

Imagery

Close your eyes and imagine looking at yourself in a mirror. You’ll probably realize that you look terrible when you’re angry, and you don’t want to look like that. That may help calm you down, according to Dennis Gersten, M.D., a San Diego psychiatrist and publisher of Atlantis, a bi-monthly imagery newsletter.

On the other hand, if you tend to suppress your anger, imagine that you’re in a room with the person you’re angry with, Dr. Gersten says. Let yourself go and really chew him out as loud as you’d like. Then imagine that there are three buckets in front of you. One is filled with water, the second is filled with honey, and the third holds confetti. Dump the buckets on the head of the person in any order you’d like until you feel that the person has been punished enough. Then stop, let go of your anger and chuckle.

Massage

A 15-minute Hellerwork self-massage (page 575) can ease or prevent the tension that people hold in their bodies when they get angry, says Dan Bienenfeld, a certified Hellerwork practitioner, a massage therapist and director of the Los Angeles Healing Arts Center.

Relaxation and Meditation

Anger often dissipates after just 20 minutes of quiet meditation, says Sundar Ramaswami, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist at the F. S. Dubois Community Mental Health Center in Stamford, Connecticut. To give meditation a try, see page 117.

Sound Therapy

It really is true: Music can soothe the savage breast. So try listening to at least 20 to 30 minutes of relaxing music when you’re feeling angry, says Steven Halpern, Ph.D., composer, researcher and author of Sound Health: The Music and Sounds That Make Us Whole. To get started, turn on the music, then sit or lie comfortably, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Dr. Halpern suggests that you wear headphones to focus your full attention and avoid distraction. He recommends, however, that you keep the speakers playing, so your body absorbs the sound energy. While the music plays, let your breath slow down and become steady. Listen not just to the notes but to the silence between the notes. Dr. Halpern says this will keep you from analyzing the music, which will allow it to relax you.

For suggested pieces to relax by, see “Sailing Away to Key Largo” on page 129. Many of these pieces are available in music stores. For mail-order information, refer to the resource list on page 642.

Vitamin and Mineral Therapy

“Both calcium and magnesium have a calming effect, so if you’re not eating a lot of foods rich in these nutrients, perhaps a supplement might be advised,” says Elson Haas, M.D., director of the Preventive Medical Center of Marin in San Rafael, California, and author of Staying Healthy with Nutrition. You can get these nutrients in many multivitamin/mineral supplements, he says. For information on foods rich in calcium and magnesium, refer to “Getting What You Need” on page 142.

Yoga

Daily practice of the complete breath exercise and meditation will help soothe hostility, says Alice Christensen, founder and executive director of the American Yoga Association. Fear is the true cause of hostility, Christensen says, and spending 5 minutes doing the complete breath exercise (see page 152) and 15 to 20 minutes doing meditation (see page 153) will help you deal with that fear. You can add a second period of meditation during the day if you have time.

See also Irritability; Type A Personality